Thor wields a mighty hammer, yeah you know he is a god
Few mortal folk can lift it, they just stand and look in awe
If he asks you to hold it, better get real comfy quick
'Cause you're not going anywhere, he's really got you licked

My kitty has no powers, not that I can tell
But then she jumps into my lap to doze off for a spell
When she purrs and kneads her paws in her tiny bliss
I'm trapped and pinned beneath her and I'm helpless to resist

Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir

When the cat jumps in my lap, I freeze all afternoon
Even when my arm's asleep, I tough it out immune
To her I'm just an armchair that can make its own heat
I don't mind being furniture when she just purrs so sweet

In theory I could get up or shift myself around
And annoy that little kitty into finally jumping down
I really want to move her but I wonder if I’m worthy
She’s just like Mjolnir if it were soft and furry

Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir

I know I’m almost late for work so I text my boss the truth
I’m gonna miss this meeting cause I’m trapped beneath the floof
She yawns and purrs and lets me scratch her sleepy little head
I open up my messages and this is what I said

Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir

Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned down by my kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir
Pinned by a purring kitty, like she's heavy as Mjolnir